Nope, not one. Not a single one. Not even the tiniest smidgen of one.
That’s right: for the first time ever in my adult life, I have not seen ONE of the movies nominated for Best Picture tomorrow night. (And YOU thought I was going to say “not one piece of chocolate! Ha ha on you!! Well, I haven’t had a single smidge of that, either.)
And that is all I will be saying about the Oscars.
I’ve decided that I must have been a cacao overlord in a previous lifetime, and now as part of my atonement, I’m seeing chocolate, chocolate everywhere–just when I’m trying most to avoid the stuff (for those of you who just joined us in medias res, I’m attempting a detox to clear my body of the influence of the Devil Chocolate–and so, the Week of Chocolate Asceticism).
As I mentioned before I began my week, I did whip up a few delectables before I started so that the blog wouldn’t be entirely bereft of the sweet stuff for the entire time. Then, last night, I even dreamt of some new chocolate-based dessert I could make!
And, of course, other bloggers are flinging chocolate this way and that, directly into my field of vision all this week: Eat Me, Delicious has just posted about a mouth-watering Chocolate Cookie Bark; The Good Eatah made a very rich, very creamy chocolate pudding; Vegan Noodle of Walking the Vegan Line made some wicked-looking truffles; Hannah made her own–homemade!–white chocolate bar; that rascal, Michael Clayton, made nothing; Cate from Sweetnicks made Chocolate Pots de Creme (how did she find the time??) and Ivonne from Cream Puffs in Venice has even devoted an entire month to the stuff (please, somebody save me!)
And so, I decided I couldn’t escape it. Although I am still determined not to let one mote, not one spec, not one shaving, not one MOLECULE of chocolate enter my mouth until I’ve given my system a decent break, I thought a little virtual indulgence wouldn’t do any harm.
So here I’ll share some photos of chocolate-based recipes I’ve played with over the past few weeks, as well as some goodies I had to bake for customers.
When I expressed some dismay that I wouldn’t be able to taste-test any of my catered goods, my friend’s very helpful teenaged daughter piped up: “Well, you could just take a bite, chew it, and then spit it out.” Remember that episode of Sex and the City, where Miranda has dinner with an ex-boyfriend? And they haven’t seen each other in years, and when they do, he’s lost a ton of weight? And then they go out to eat at a swanky NYC restaurant, and he orders steak? And then she catches him spitting a gnarly, saliva-soaked wad of chewed steak into his napkin? Yep, that’s the one. And so you see why I couldn’t take the daughter’s advice.
As it turns out, I’ve made most of these items several hundred times, so I didn’t have to break my WOCA and sample anything.
The first item was a Double Chocolate Mint Explosion Cookie, part of the treats table at a birthday party. These are fudgy on the inside, just slightly crispy on the outside–a definite winner with kids and adults alike.
Then I revisited a recent experiment with vegan chocolate-covered caramels (to which I must devote an entire post, anon):
After that, the chocolate rush subsided a bit, leaving just the chips in a Chocolate-Chip Blondie, baked for a school event (yes, indeedy, that is a kitchen towel behind the plate):
Next up, a Chocolate Satin Tart. These were a holiday item last year, which I baked for a vegan meal-delivery service here in Toronto to give to their customers (I hear they’re thinking of expanding to Calgary, where the Canadian Music Awards–called the Junos–are taking place this year). A shortbread-like crust is filled with chocolate ganache, then dusted with cocoa:
And I ended the virtual pig-out with a memory of a recent experiment, with sugar-free, gluten-free chocolate buttercream frosting:
After this heady daydream, I felt prepared to snack on my lovely carob pudding, or raw fig and cherry bars (recipe to follow eventually). And while it’s true that this No-Chocolate Land is a tough place to be (and it’s no country for old men, either, believe me), I do feel more energetic, a bit more in balance, and happy about my healthy eating ths week.
WOCA Update: Big, massive, seismic cravings today. And just when I thought they’d all passed! Serves me right for being so smug about it last post. But I shall persevere. . . I shall battle the demon with all my wits and all my inner resources. . . and I shall overcome. . . the scourge. . . that is Chocolate! Watch out; it’s possible there will be blood. (Oooh. Do you think I could maybe get away with just one little, tiny, eensy-weensy piece? Naw, didn’t think so.)
And to those of you who watch them, enjoy the Oscars tomorrow (and sorry about that Juno reference. It was either that or mention the mythological daughter of Saturn.)
[All of these recipes will appear in my upcoming cookbook, Sweet Freedom, along with more than 100 others, most of which are not featured on this blog. For more information, check the “Cookbook” button at right, or visit the cookbook blog.]